Avoiding Social Isolation in Social Distancing During COVID 19

Coronavirus is currently a global pandemic, infecting hundreds of thousands of people in many countries, and causing widespread panic and fear. To combat this, Americans have been encouraged to avoid large gatherings in what has been called "social distancing." The effect of this is lowering the possibility of exposure to the virus, slowing its spread, and reducing its overall impact on our society.

The unfortunate effect of this social distancing, however, is social isolation.

While you may be safe and healthy alone in your home, you may also begin to experience loneliness. You may find yourself feeling bored without all the usual entertainment tools available to us. You may also feel disconnected as you spend time away from other people, even though you may still be participating in activities online.

What can be done to prevent social loneliness and feelings of isolation?

Here are a few practical tips for staying connected during quarantine:

1. Call or FaceTime one friend every day.
2. Write someone a handwritten letter.
3. Bring groceries or supplies to someone in need.

Call or FaceTime one friend every day

As people are spending less time away from others, it's important to maintain a connection with one another. Even though we can't physically be together, we can still use technology to stay connected. Consider making a list of people you might usually see doing the regular activities in your life. Then, take time every day to call or FaceTime them and check in on how they're doing. Ask about their worries or fears. Find out what they're doing to stay busy and entertained. Consider playing a game together through technology.

While this is not a replacement for in-person companionship, it can significantly help you avoid social isolation and increase the feeling of camaraderie during this worrisome time. Knowing that others are in the same boat and sharing in those experiences can help reduce your sense of isolation until things change in the world around us (which they will).

Write Someone a Handwritten Letter

Yes, you read that right. You can write someone you know and care about a handwritten letter with pen and paper, then send it in the snail mail in an envelope with a stamp! Although this is an "old fashioned" way of sending messages to people, it is still a valuable way of connecting with people you care about and preventing social isolation.

Think about it from the other person's perspective for a moment. It's not very often that we get something personalized in the mail. Imagine sifting through a bunk of junk mail and finding a letter addressed to you with your friend's return address on it. You open it up with curiosity and read excitedly as they're sharing some personal thoughts, recent experiences, and hopes for their future. They ask you questions about yourself, showing interest and knowledge of your life. They demonstrate through these questions that they've been thinking about you and care about you. Wouldn't that make your day, if not your week?

I've gotten handwritten "Thank You" cards from people after giving them a birthday or wedding gift, and always feel so connected and cared for when reading those letters. You can give that same joy to someone else - and truly share in that joy with them - by writing a handwritten note.

Bring Groceries or Supplies to Someone in Need

A final idea to help prevent social isolation is to do something helpful for someone in need. Find a neighbor or friend who is unable to leave their house because they're at greatest risk. Ask if you can go to the grocery store and bring them back some things they might need, even if it's only a handful of items. The simple act of caring for someone and taking a little bit of time to be helpful would mean a great deal to them, which you can treasure inside as joy for yourself.

Your act of kindness doesn't have to be much. It can be as simple as milk and bread. You could drop something off at the post office (maybe they wrote someone a handwritten letter!). It can be picking up some over the counter meds at the local pharmacy.

Whatever it is, a simple act of kindness can help get you out of your loneliness. It could even jump you into connection with someone else within a matter of minutes. If you need something and know a friend is going to be at the store, you could also take the chance to reach out and ask for help yourself. Either way, when people are helping one another, it brings us all closer together and makes meaning out of life.

This is NOT the end of the conversation about connection during COVID!

These few ideas are by no means the extent of the possibilities. My hope is that they get you thinking about what you could do and jumpstart your creative problem-solving. In many ways, it doesn't really matter what you do; simply trying to connect with someone or doing something nice for someone else can be meaningful enough.

Also, if you haven't picked up the clue by now, getting out of yourself and putting yourself into something larger than you is a big part of this. That doesn't mean you have to do something big, but doing something for or with someone else is larger than you. These kinds of activities have greater meaning, require some element of vulnerability, and have a deep reward on the other end.

Finally, if you're reading this it means you might feel lonely and isolated. I hope that even this article strikes a chord in you and makes you feel more connected. Remember that as I write this, I'm thinking of the same things you are and wanting to not feel disconnected or lonely either. We're in this together. :-)

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